Cat Got Your Tounge? Feet? Hands? BODY?
by lildaisy77
Summary: Serena and Darien wake up to find themselves in the bodies of Luna and Artemis and vice versa. How will they cope with Mina in her underwear, Serena’s bad test scores suddenly turned A’s and who ever heard of two cats on a date? NEW CHAPTER AS OF 12505
1. The Cats Outa The Bag

Blink. Blink A pale head yawned wide and sleep crusted eyes opened slowly. They lazily scanned their surroundings and found the room to be bright orange rather than the sedate blue it always was. The eyes blinked rapidly and hands reached up to wipe sleep away. Only they weren't hands, they were pale white paws with little claws half poking out. Darien gave a start of surprise at the slight error in his anatomy and sat upright, or rather he tried and only ended up rolling off the bed. Shaking the impact from his head, Darien attempted to stand up, only to collapse to the floor again. Cats were not meant to stand on hind legs alone apparently. Darien heard a rustling noise and a pillow came hurdling his way. 

"Artemis be quiet, I still have 15 minutes before we meet the girls!" a voice surprisingly similar to his girlfriends' friend Mina shrieked. The pillow would have been easily avoided in his regular human form, but an uncoordinated cat body had less success. Darien ended up on the floor again being smothered by a shockingly orange cushion.

_ 'Let me get this straight, I'm in Mina's room and have shrunk to the size of her cat? No. Way. I need to stop studying so late and I won't get bad dreams.'_

Darien, in Artemis' body, began to pace the floor, searching himself for a way to wake up. Pinching wasn't an option since he had no opposable thumbs and water seemed unpleasant, especially in a cats' body. The only option would be to get Mina to pinch him and he proceeded to hop onto the bed in search of a pinch. Well, more like_ try_ to hop on the bed. Walking on four paws was harder then he imagined and it took six attempts before victory was his. Walking up to Mina's head, he began to poke at her face softly. With no results Darien poke harder and was rewarded with a shriek of surprise and another pillow flopped on his head. Shaking stars out of his eyes, Darien moved closer to talk to her.

"Um…Mina?" he began tentatively.

"What do you want you monster? I _still_ have 3 minutes you know." she whined but a death glare from her cat shut her up. " Oh alright. I'm up, I'm up. What do you want?"

"Hey Mina, not to sound weird or anything but…will you pinch me? It's really impo-" before he could finish Mina had gleefully stretched his face out into a maniacal grin to envy Satan. "Owwwwww! Wet go Wina!" As his face snapped back into place, Darien concluded that this was definitely not a dream and that Mina needed to be reported to animal services. Trying to rub his sore face with his unwieldy paws Darien hissed at Mina and proceeded to pretend to wash his fur.

"So why did you want me to pinch you? Bad dream Artemis? Did you imagine Luna breaking up with you?" she receded into giggles and threw the covers off to get dressed. That's when Darien noticed Mina, friend of his girlfriend, was clad only in pale orange panties and a white bra. If Serena ever found out about this he knew he'd be dead and to save himself further agony, Darien shot under the bed and cowered there in anticipated pain.

"What's up Artemis?" Mina questioned. Darien heard sounds of feet and before he could move Minas' face was shoved under the bed, giving him ample view of… well…the twins. Yowling in shock, he tried to run away but Mina, with her long _human_ arms, pulled a wiggling Darien out and smashed him up against the aforementioned twins. Darien couldn't help himself and he sighed in happiness. Never before had he been able to actually fit between a pair of breasts. Realizing his dirty thoughts Darien lunged out of her grasp and barley made it too the bed.

"Now Mina, I need you to listen and listen _very_ carefully ok?" He slowly spoke while backing away from Mina. At her slight nod of curiosity he continued, "O. K. This will sound really wired but, here goes. I'm not Artemis. I'm Darien. I don't know how I got in your room or why I'm a cat all of a sudden but I suggest you go get dressed so we can figure this out with the other girls. I' not too coordinated in this body, but we really need to hurry." Mina stared at him in shock and started to break out into massive giggles.

"Oh, that's rich Artemis! Real rich!" she squealed in laughter and fell to the floor, tear sin her eyes."You really expect me to believe that my cat is now housing Serena's boyfriend? I seriously doubt Darien would have tried to escape from a hug by a girl in her underwear." she quickly sobered up and crawled closer to peer at the cats face. Gone was Artemis' good humored grin or dopey smile. In place was a highly disgruntled smirk, one often worn by Serena's' boyfriend, Darien. "No. Way. This can't be happening. Is that really you Darien? Oh my God, I'm in my underwear!"

She pounced on the bedspread and ripped it out from under Darien to cover herself. Mina slowly backed away from the now evilly cat into the bathroom and locked the door behind her. Darien sighed and began the long wait of a girl getting ready to brave the outside.

> 

Meanwhile, Darien's body was curled up into a ball in his big bed, glorying in blankets all to himself. Artemis started to wake up and not feeling Mina's weight, thought he was late for the scout meeting. He hurried through his morning stretches and only slightly noticed the fact his nails had gotten quite a bit shorter when he kneaded the sheets and that his coat felt strangely loose.

_ 'Guess I'm loosing weight. I must get Mina to up my food a little more. Don't want Luna to think I can't hunt for myself.'_

Not wanting to be any later then already thought to be, Artemis didn't even bother with the door. He quickly jumped out of the window, not noticing the extra 17 floors added due to being in Darien's apartment. Bounding across the roof tops, Artemis felt his back legs seemed much longer and was rather taken aback when a strange woman screamed in shock at the sight of him running across her window sill. Artemis kept on his way, trying to get to the sailor meeting as fast as possible.

> 

On the other side of town Luna was getting ready to wake Serena up when she noticed something was horribly wrong. Her eyes snapped open and noticed her view was of directly above her rather than horizontal like everyday before. She went to stand up sharply but succeeded only in jerking Serena's back painfully. Quickly comprehending the body switch, she searched the room for her own body only to find it aguishly stretched out on a pillow beside her. Smiling wickedly she yowled, as best as a human throat could do, loudly into the cats' ear and watched as Serena plummeted to the floor in am unfamiliar body.

"Hey Luna! That was sooo mean. I was getting up and you didn'tWait! What happened to me! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Luna help me!" Serena screamed and tried to jump back into the bed but experienced the same problem Darien had earlier, four legs. Luna started to pity her and went to pick Serena up, when a pair of sharp teeth plunged into her hand. She jumped up sharply at blanched at the evil grin on her old face. Serena was out for blood for being in a cat body and Luna was only expected to pay since she had stolen her human form. Serena jumped up angrily, the adrenaline helping cancel out the clumsiness, and strated stalking toward her body. Luna, panicking, threw off the blankets and not used to Serena's long, slender legs just happened to tumble unceremoniously to the floor.

Serena, realizing she was in trouble for biting her mentor, ran to the door and started clawing madly at the wood to be let out. Sammy, in the hallway at that exact moment, hearing the noise let a scaredy cat Serena out of the room.

"Geez Serena, don't be so mean to that stupid act. I hate 'em but Luna doesn't deserve whatever you're doing to her." he laughed as Luna got up and unsteadily made her way to the door but Sammy slammed it in her face. A not quite defeated Luna pulled open that dreadful door and walked as fast as she could to follow Serena to the only place the cat-girl would dare go, the temple. She didn't seem to notice the strange look her mother and father gave her from being in pajamas still. Well not really pajamas, just a really big T-shirt that was stolen from Darien last time she went to his place.

"Where do you think you are going in that outfit young lady!" her paranoid father screeched, but to no avail. The door had been closed in his angry face seconds before he spoke. "I'd better go get that girl before a pack of girl crazy boys drags her off." "It's fine Ken. She had shorts on underneath that shirt." she calmly explained, but whispered to herself, "at least I hope she did."

With the four people on their way to the temple, things could only begin to shape up. Right? Not exactly.

On her way Luna way "cat called" at by 14 different men, Darien was chased by a pack of cat crazy dogs, Serena got trapped by a little girl intent of putting a ribbon on her tail, and Artemis, well lets just say Artemis happened to run through an are highly populated by pigeons dare and came out rather unclean compared to before.

> 

Next Update will be the next time I don't have a test to study for. Ch. 2 is half done so it shoudn't be too long.


	2. Mistakes and Misunderstandings

* * *

It just so happen that all four of the switched people arrived at the temple steps at the same time, go figure. It took a second for recognition of their own bodies to kick in, causing all parties involved to strop walking completely. Serena was the first to recover her shock and took off for the consolation of her boyfriends' embrace. 

"Ooooo! Darien!" Serena yelled and ran as fast as she could toward Mr. Tall, Dark, and Handsome. She leapt into his arms and began nuzzling her head against his chin, reveling in his smell and warmth. Artemis was shocked at Luna's display of affection but because pleased and began to nuzzle her back. The same unpleasant thought hit the two of them at the same time.

_'Wait! Why is Darien snuggling with Luna! He doesn't know its me yet."_

_'Hold on a second! Why would Luna be cozying up to Darien when my body is right in front of her.'_

In her anger Serena leapt from his arms and stalked over to "Luna" to have a little talk about her rights to Darien and the fact that she had none. Before she got there though Artemis jumped in front of her to say hello and Serena realized that Artemis might want a kiss. She blanched at the thought and ran as fast as possible up to the temple. Luna was meanwhile advancing on Darien to get a little assistance in the whole body switching incident from the only rational person in sight, beside herself of course, and Artemis realized Serena probably wanted a kiss. He paled at the thought and followed "Luna" as quickly as his new body would take him. Darien and Luna were left staring strangely at each other before trudging up to follow their loved ones into the temple.

10 minutes later found the story of body switching told to the Sailor Scouts and a horrendously unnerved Amy working madly at her little computer figuring out the odds of this happening. Serena was fast asleep on Darien's tail and Artemis was "curled" up on Luna's lap, a sight that had Mina in tears over from laughing so hard.

"Alright, everybody I found it…" Amy declared, standing up quickly, but she was cut off by a flurry of questions.

"How to fix us?"

"Why this happened?"

"How do you switch us back Amy?

"Zzzzzzz"

"Er…no. I found that the probability of this happening is 833,563,573,673,957,836 to 1." the group sighed collectively at her display of geek and waited expectantly for her to finish the speech. "It seems that Darien, Serena, Luna, and Artemis switched bodies for the fun of it. I suppose it could be a nega-verse trick, but I can discern no evil aura around any of them. You will have to live as happily as possible in your new bodies ." she smiled politely and sat down again. Then all hell broke loose.

"You've got to be kidding me Amy!" a now awake Serena screamed. "How am I suppose to make out with Darien without LIPS!"

"Serena! Not so loudly, they'll think its _all_ we do together." A scandalized Darien yelped. "We do other stuff I swear…"

"Like what Darien? Exactly how far have you to gone?" a curious Mina pondered aloud.

"That's not what I meant and That's none of your business! I meant we go on dates."

"And make out" Serena added in all seriousness.

"And we go dancing"

"And make out there too." She continued.

"Oh, and we also hang out at the park a lot and have picnics." he tried futilely

"Wow Darien, I never realized how much we do make out. And now we caaaaan't" she wailed,  
her cat body shaking in tears. Darien placed a comforting paw on her shoulder and instinctively licked her head with affection.

"Awwwwww." was heard by the collective girls, causing Darien's whiskers to sag in embarrassment. A "How cute" soon followed and Darien's whole body sagged. Luna was happily finding her new body entertaining over in the corner and was picking things up and then setting the down again. Opposable thumbs were a very novel idea to her. Artemis, watching his beloved, soon picked up on the habit and the two of them began madly fascinated with carrying objects from one side of the temple room to the other.

Luna, in her over exuberance, tripped over a slightly droopy Darien, threw her cup in the air, and landed with a 'thwump' on top of the two cats. Mumbling was heard from under Luna, and as she was getting up, Serena's voice could be heard echoing throughout the temple.

"Ha! So it looks like Luna is just as clumsy as I am in a human body." she cried in delight, all sadness over her unable to suck Darien's face gone. She jumped up on the table to continue her rant of happiness. "You guys can't tease me anymore and I want an apol-" in her excitement, Serena just happened to walk right off the edge of the table and into Lita's lap. The shock girl jumped up, throwing Serena to the floor and leaving bruise on her tail end.

"Owwwwww! That's not fair, I thought I was cured of being a klutz." she whimpered.  
Darien, feeling bad for his girlfriend, gave her another lick on the head and wrapped his tail possessively around her.

"It's part of your charm Meatball head and I wouldn't want you any other way, ok?" he lovingly consoled her.

"Awwwwww." was heard from the girls again, but this time Darien merely hissed and glared at them all.

"I guess we'd better be happy that they both changed." Raye joked. "I wouldn't want to see a cat and a human in love." the girls all giggled at this and Serena looked sullen. Luna, encouraged by all this talk of "Romance" got a few ideas of her own and looked smugly at Artemis' new shape. She never realized how attractive Darien's body was before and now it was all hers.

"I really could go for a pick me up ice cream guys." Serena begged.

"Now Serena, you are in a cats' body and the stomach can't handle anything foreign." a sympathetic Amy explained. "Maybe you should start snort getting used to giggle the taste of cat FOOD!" she burst out laughing and collapsed to the floor hooting. Serena became depressed and went off to the corner to sulk.

"Wait. Wait. Wait. Does this mean I can't drink coffee? What am I going to dooooooooo?" he wailed, almost exactly like Serena, and went off to join her in sulking. The two depressed cats was enough to set the group off again. Serena, looking for an ally, started searching fro Luna, only to find her lips locked onto a slowly suffocating Artemis'.

"Get off my boyfriend!" she shrieked in anger, forgetting her boyfriend was pouting beside her in his cat shape.

Luna recoiled from Artemis in shame and began to furiously apologize to her "owner".  
Serena, after realizing that it wasn't Darien, relaxed and proceeded to fall fast asleep. She was really getting the hang of this cat thing.

"Hey now Artemis, I know you're in my body but I don't want you to do anything I wouldn't do in it. I don't want to come home to find something wrong, like a tattoo or a massive hickey." he proceeded to lecture and both Luna and Artemis flushed in embarrassment.

"No problem Prince. I solemnly swear I won't do anything you wouldn't do, given half the chance of course." he sniggered. Darien was ready to blow a gasket. "I mean if Serena ever said 'Hey Darien, lets go all the way', I doubt you would say no. Am I right man? Eh? Eh?" he tittered and nudged the cat version of Darien.

"I'll show you 'Go all the way'! You'll go all the way to the hospital buddy!" and that said, he launch himself at his old body. Artemis received a badly bruised ego, some scratches to the face, and a nasty gash on his left arm, before the "attack" was ended by Lita pulling the angry white cat off by his neck scruff.

"Oh Darien, that was so sweeeeeet. You protected my honor." the newly awakened Serena exclaimed and began to purr with happiness. "I still want ice cream though. Amy, how about vanilla? It's almost like milk, right?"

"I didn't think of that Serena." the now baffled genius said. Serena was getting smarter then her? No way. "I don't suppose it would hurt, but no chocolate sauce or sprinkles ok?"

"Wahoo!" she screamed and bolted out the door, presumably for Crown Parlor.

"Just wait until Andrew refuses to serve a cat." a highly amused Raye observed. The rest of the Sailors giggled a little before following their leader out the door, leaving Luna, Darien, and Artemis alone.

"Well, we need to rearrange living conditions until this problem can be fixed." a redeemed Luna began. I mean, Darien mostly. You can't live with Mina, since you are technique still a male."

"What! And I'm not a male?" the now indignant Artemis screeched. "Since when have I not been a male? I have the proof right here Luna!' he reached for his PJ pants to "prove" exactly how manly he was but Luna swatted him upside the head before any "manhood" could be seen. "Oh, sorry. I got a little carried away, As you were saying."

The mollified Luna glared at Artemis and started to talk again, "As I was saying,  
Darien you should probably stay with Artemis in your apartment, we don't want a repeat of this morning's antics."

"Sorry Luna, but my building doesn't allow pets" he started cautiously, "but maybe I could stay with you and Serena. I mean, it's not like I have _anywhere_ else I could go." he pouted. Luna glared daggers, but had to give up in the end. It was decided that Darien would stay in the Tsukino household but not in Serena's room. The three ended their meeting and decided to catch up to the gang at Crown. Artemis wanted to try flirting with a few girls in his new stud body and Luna had an extreme craving for a milkshake.

Unbeknownst to the happy couple, Darien snuck off halfway there to try roof hoping as a cat. Too bad Tuxedo Mask didn't have four legs to jump with.

_'Wait. What are we going to do if a youma attacks? I hope Artemis won't bumble my image if he has to transform. I wonder if Luna could even do a somersault if attacked?'_

* * *

You are all so lucky that I got tired of studying for mt test and decided to write instead.  
I won't be able to post again until Friday night or Saturday due to school, so keep checking for new stuff. Thank you for all the great reviews and I'm glad I made people happy. 


	3. Hemorrhaging and Hormones

The situation at Crown arcade and fruit parlor was, interesting, to say the least. OK so maybe Serena attached to Andrew's head and Luna and Artemis sucking face against the counter was more then interesting, but the girls found it so. No one more so then Raye. She was laughing, huge guffawing bursts, and it was infectious. The disease was soon spread all around the group, except for a slightly bleeding Andrew. 

"Will one of you hyenas get Luna off of me! I think I lost enough skin to cover another person and the blood is getting in my eyes." he calmly stated, barley containing his amusement at the "Darien and Serena" situation happening on his counter. "Why would Luna even care if her mistress makes out with her boyfriend and go mental like this…"

His words seemed to clear Serena's head and she leapt to the counter, after retracting her claws from poor Andrew's flesh. She meowed an apology and proceeded to rub up against him, begging for forgiveness. Now what guy would not "care" about his girlfriend rubbing against another guy, no less an old crush? Well, a better man then Darien was.

Entering the building after his jumping spree, he found Serena in that incriminating tableau and was instantly turned jealous. All Andrew knew was his scalp had started to feel a little better before a white blur attached itself to his abused head, cat hormones surecause wacky stuff. Poor guy.

The reaction of any "sane" girlfriend witnessing her boyfriend's jealousy would normally be love and then a little anger for the barbarous act, but Serena was far from normal. She just happened to forget that it was her "coming on" to Andrew and began to cheer Darien on in his mad quest to scalp the arcade worker. That same arcade worker was soon on the floor, passed out from the surprise of a cat yelling, "Yah Darien! Go, go, go!"

"Oops. I shouldn't have talked right?" a now solemn Serena asked.

"No, Serena, you shouldn't have. How are we going to explain this the Andrew when he wakes up?" disgruntled Lita growled. It was her dream boat that had angry, red scratches and possible a lump on his head to mar the good looks. A slightly crumpled Darien emerged from behind the counter and seemed to blush.

"Heh, heh. Whoops?" he shylystated and a torrent of napkin wads were thrown at his head.

"I guess we should put him in the back room and just leave?" Amy rationalized. "If he asks about us, just say it was a dream and we were all at the park today."

"Did you say something Amy?" a breathless Luna asked. Her hair had fallen out of its meatballs and her lips looked bruised from Artemis's treatment. "I thought I heard your voice and it..., why is Andrew on the floor covered in blood?"

"Long story Luna and what did we say about abusing our bodies like that? I didn't give you permission to use my lips so harshly little Miss Human." Serena complained. "I miss kissing Darien!"

"I miss it too meatball head." he sighed and moved closer to his girlfriend. In a slight whisper, "Why don't we go on a little date to get our minds off this stupid situation? I'll treat you to dinn- I mean we can go for a walk in the park and take a nice nap in the shade ok?"

She immediately perked up and the two of them snuck out of the arcade as fast as their little paws could go. Lita was busy dragging Andrew to the back room so nobody noticed the door slid open and shut.

"Well that takes care of him, so lets get out of here guys." Mina sensibly said. "We should all go back to the temple, waaaaait. Where are Luna... I mean Serena and Darien? Anybody see them go somewhere."

The group all shook their heads and they began to search madly for the two disappearing kitties. Not finding them in the arcade, the four sailors ran into the street, not noticing Luna and Artemis were sucking face, again, in a back booth. Kissing sure is addicting to cats.

* * *

Well, here is a short chapter without much substance. I needed a transition phase to spilt them all up and you lucky dogs get this zinger. I will hopefully post tonight again or sometime this weekend. I really appreciate all the reviews you guys entered and I'll try and update as much as possible.


	4. Cats Always Land On Their Feet, Even In ...

Darien and Serena ran toward the park, checking over their shoulders again and again for the girls or Artemis and Luna. Panting slightly, they slid under a bush and proceeded to laze there for a few minutes. Darien nuzzled Serena's head and slipped out from under their cover. She was about to yell after him and remembered about her being a cat. Cat's just can't start talking, look what happened to Andrew. 

Instead she followed and after getting her rear end un-stuck, ran into kitty Darien holding a rose in his mouth. He grinned and dropped it at her feet.

"I couldn't resist Serena." he laughed. "They were right in front of me and, well, you get it. The whole Tuxedo Kitty image just cracks me up."

"You are so sweet and I love you to pieces." she replied, eyes glazed over with fondness . She sniffed the rose and sadly walked away from it, not being able to carry it around all day. Maybe it would brighten somebody else's day. "And just think of me in a Sailor Suit."

"Me-owwww!" he joked. "So how do you like being of the feline persuasion?" Darien continued. They were now strolling along the lake, tail in tail. A little girl "awwwed" at their cuteness and had her mother take a picture of the auspicious event. Darien smiled at his girlfriend's face contorted in thought and shoved her playfully. Serena, being so deep in contemplation, was shoved just a little too far and her paws splashed into the water.

"Oh no, you didn't." she snapped. "Cats hate water and I am now a cat. Come over here cause you are a dead idiot." she screamed and started chasing him along the shore, getting more wet then the one splash had.

"Come on Serena! I 'm sorry! Mercy, mercy, MERCY!" he yelled as she pinned him in the shallow part of the lake. He spluttered from the water and soon turned the tables on her by flipping her over and tickling her with his tail as she lay prone under his paws. "Look who's so high and mighty now, eh? Say Uncle and I'll let you go dearest."

"NEVER!" and she lunged, but Darien tossed her over his head and into the lake. She landed deeper then she could stand and Serena, forgetting she was in a cat body, began to swim away from Darien as fast as possible. The water logged kitty soon realized what a mess she was in and started to struggle wildly. Darien debated going for help or diving in himself. It would take a few seconds to grab a handy human or if he dove in, he would end up in the same pickle. Quickly deciding, he sprinted away, looking for a human.

All Serena saw was her one hope, her true love, her boyfriend, abandon her in her time of need.

_'Oh Darien! He probably has to hide to change into Tuxedo Mask. He wouldn't leave me would he? Oh somebody please he-'_

Her thoughts were shut off as a strong hand grabbed the scruff of her neck and hauled her into a small row boat. She lay panting on the deck floor before looking up to her savoir. It was the most gorgeous girl she had ever seen, and was instantly jealous of her looks. She mewed thanks and turned around to nap, but stopped when she saw who was rowing the boat.

A man equal to Darien in good looks if not even more so smiled at her sweetly. Serena was immediately glad she was a cat or the embarrassment would have been to much to handle. They were a perfect couple and she bet he'd never abandon _her_ if she were drowning. Serena sighed a little kitty sigh and promptly went to sleep.

A frazzled Darien returned to the scene of the accident with a young boy and to his dismay, his Serena was nowhere in sight. The boy looked strangely at the hyper cat who wouldn't stop biting him until he followed, shrugged, and walked away. Darien broke into horrible kitty sobs that racked his whole frame. His beloved Serena was dead.

* * *

Amy and Lita had taken a left and were soon jogging down the main shopping district hoping Serena would be crazy enough to want new cloths to match her new hair color. They sighed and started to turn around when they saw an uncannily familiar black cat drive by in a matching black convertible. Well at least Serena found something to match her fur. They, well actually Lita, because she could keep up with the car, ran after their Scout leader to a mansion a few blocks over. Amy panted up a few minutes later and they stared in awe at the huge palace-like structure before them. 

The car was disappearing into a massive garage, so Lita boldly stepped forward and pressed the gate bell.

"Can I help you young ladies?" a snobby voice rang out. Amy noticed Lita was frozen from the classiness of it all and took over speedily.

"Yes. I think your employer found my cat and I'm hear with my friend to pick her up.' she replied with as much snob as she could muster. This is how you dealt with these people and she'd learned it from growing up with her wealthy mother and the parties that went hand in hand.

"Let me check. Please wait a moment." the cackling fizz of the speaker went dead and they smiled uncertainly at each other. Lita was about to speak when the box hissed back into life.

"I'll buzz you ladies right up. Your cat seems to be unhurt but shaken." a kind voice declared. They glanced at each other and began the long march up the landscaped driveway to rival a king's.

* * *

Well, I lied. It took me um about a month and a half to update. Whoops. I've been busy, what can I say. Hope you like the new chapter. It's been on my computer since April but I never uploaded it. Ha, ha. Oh. your not laughing? I'll stop now. I'm not making _any_ promises but I'll try to update A.S.A.P. 


	5. Yum Yum In My Tum Tum

I am a horrible person who needs to be stopped from torturing her poor fans. Gah. I got sooooo busy with theatre that I kinda forgot about this story. heh. Well winter break is in a week and a half so get ready for a big, long, huge chapter to make up for not updating since May. I mean who dowesn't update for 7 months? ME thats who. Sorry, I still love to hear your comments and am working on responding to ALL of the reviews you all left me. If you don't have one yet, just wait and I'll get around to you. ENJOY!

* * *

Luna withdrew her tongue from Artemis' mouth and leaned back against the padded booth. Artemis was gasping for air but had a pleased look on his face, when a banging noise erupted from the back room. Andrew burst out of back hallway and collapsed on a stool by the counter. He stared around the room, his eyes finally landing on a pleased Serena and the suffocated Darien in the corner. He made his way groggily over to them, only stumbling a few times.

"Hey guys. Do either of you know why I was in the back closet?" the two guilty kitties looked innocently at him and actually managed to keep a straight face when they shook their heads 'no'. Andrew seemed confused for moment before he remembered what he was doing there. "Ok. I suppose I might have been napping. Well I guess I'll get back to work. Can I get either of you something?"

Luna realized right away it was her chance to try human foods and burst into a huge grin. Andrew saw that familiar gleam of chocolate deficiency in her eyes and fell back into his shop keeper mode.

"I'll have a triple chocolate sundae, bacon cheeseburger, onion rings, and a strawberry shake, Andrew. And Arti-- I mean, Darien wants a coffee and a chocolate sundae. Thank you." she smiled pleasantly and began to clean her nails with her fork. Andrew glanced at Darien for a moment and walked to counter to get the order up. Right then, the glare Artemis shot in Luna's direction could have withered a cactus, but she smiled cutely and continued to ignore him.

"What exactly was the point of that? I hope you know I'm not going to drink that vile concoction of acids and sugar or eat any frozen cow juice." he hissed. Luna looked extremely put out.

"Why not? We have been given a gift to understand our King and Queen better by living in their bodies, so we must try to experience the things they love so much. I'm sure this is something future Queen Serenity has done to teach us all a lesson." Luna calmly pondered. It was Artemis' turn to look put out now. He looked skeptically at Luna but let her continue. "I mean, who else has the power to do this? Amy said she found no trace of the Negaverse in us, so it has to be for the best."

Artemis looked so confused and skeptic that Luna couldn't help but laugh but before she could tease he was saved by the proverbial bell. The door to the arcade opened to reveal a dejected Raye and Mina returning without success. They dragged themselves to the booth and plopped down next to Luna.

"What's wrong? Mina? Raye? Where are the others?" Raye shot daggers at her adviser and slumped her head onto her arms. Mina winked apologetically and patted her friend on the back, waving over Andrew at the same time.

"We went looking for Serena and Darien but couldn't find them anywhere. I hope Lita and Amy had better luck.

"What do you mean you couldn't find Darien and Serena?" Luna almost shouted. "How hard is it to find the only two talking cats in the city? I can't have my body out there do who knows what in public." she whimpered and put her head on her forearms, same as Raye, as if to hide her shame. Artemis looked at her mockingly and smiled slightly to himself.

"It's not like we've been treating their bodies any better." Artemis pointed out and to prove his point, Andrew arrived with their order on a huge tray. He noticed the two newcomers and sighed in relief.

"Oh, now I get why you ordered so much food Serena. What anything else Raye? Mina?" he asked and whipped out his handy dandy server pad and pulled a pencil from behind his ear in anticipation.

"I'll just have a diet coke Andrew," she started, "Oh and a side of you."

Raye and her broke out into a fit of giggles making Andrew sigh. He couldn't help it if the customers of female persuasion flirted with him but nobody said he had to hate it.

"And you Raye? Anything?" he asked, smothering a smile.

"Nah. I'm good. Just a glass of water." she smiled. As Andrew walked off, they closed ranks and started to whisper about the missing King and Queen while on the other side of town, Amy and Lita were trudging up a mile long drive way.

"I sure hope Serena comes willingly." Lita pouted. Amy sigh and continued working her way up the path. She couldn't help notice the decorative hedges were in the shape of cats in different positions and when they finally reached the driveway, a huge fountain was in the front. A gilded cat on its hide legs swatted at an imaginary enemy while water spewed from its mouth. "Amy, I think this guy has major issues."

"Yeah. Me too." she agreed. "Who has a cat fountain in their yard? Seriously." As the approached the front doors, a butler, wearing cats ears and draw on whiskers, opened the massive entry way. Lita burst out laughing and the butler seemed not very amused. He bowed, pointing the way down an austere hall. Lita and Amy strode forward, to find their feline friend.

* * *

Yeah, a cliffhanger. My creative juices were sucked out by English HW I did first. Just wait for a great, big chapter during winter break. PLease keep reviewing and try reading some of my other stories, they are funny too. Or so I'd like to think. 


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